


Someone Just Hold Me, Please

by artbyweb86



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Awkward Dates, Buck misses his friend, Buck tries dating, Eddie is touch starved too, Eddie realizes something, Epic Fail, Evan "Buck" Buckley Needs A Hug, Eventual Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz, F/M, First Dates, Insecure Evan "Buck" Buckley, M/M, Multi, Tactile friendships, Touch-Starved, someone just hold him
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-14
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-15 17:07:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,086
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29811645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artbyweb86/pseuds/artbyweb86
Summary: It feels like his friendship with Eddie has taken a backseat ever since Ana came into the picture.He was foolish to think it could be just 'Buck and Eddie' for the long term.So Buck decides to reenter the dating world again. He has several dates lined up.They don't go well. At all. He'll just accept that he is the king of first date fails.
Relationships: Eddie Diaz/Ana Flores (9-1-1 TV), Evan "Buck" Buckley & Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Evan "Buck" Buckley & Original Character(s), Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Comments: 8
Kudos: 133





	Someone Just Hold Me, Please

"Hey, Buck?"

He and Eddie were changing to go home for the day. They hadn't seen each other much outside of work these days. Eddie was dating Ana. It seemed pretty serious, as it was going strong for three months now. He had been over at Eddie's only a few times since then. A few times to babysit Christopher and once to watch a game. Ana had been there too. He sat on the loveseat, while Ana was sitting closely with Eddie on the couch, a leg draped over his lap.

He even felt as if Eddie was pulling away from him at work too. They didn't sit close to each other any more. There was less. Less touch communication. They had always been tactile. A bump on the shoulder, a pat on the knee, or knees knocking together after a call to see how the other was doing. They even had looks and facial tics that they didn't even have to talk and knew what the other was thinking.

It was more verbal communication now. Not that he didn't mind. They were still talking. Still connected. Still friends. It just felt different. Less. Less. Less.

He shared that with his therapist. She had to remind him that Eddie was in the honeymoon period of a new relationship. Choosing to focus on one person. In this case two people. His son and now girlfriend. He can't divide his time between too many people right now. Once he sees he has neglected his friend, he will come around. Just give it time.

He liked Ana. He really did. She was kind and sweet. She made Eddie smile. She was nice to Christopher. Chris seemed to like her too, after a short period of uncertainty.

It was hard. But he had to trust that his friend would know what he was feeling. They had talked about it at the station. Regarding Red. His sister knew his hurt. Did he ever go in depth with Eddie about that?

No.

Shit.

Oh, hello insecurities. Go away please.

"Uh, Buck? Hello?"

He was startled out of his thoughts with a hand waving in front of his face. He blinked and turned to where Eddie was standing.

"Oh, hey Eddie. Sorry. What's up?"

"Are you free either Tuesday or Thursday? Wondering if you could babysit Christopher?"

Is that all he is good for nowadays? Not that he didn't love Christopher. They always have a great time. But he is the only single one of the 118 now. He or Hen always assume he is free. When Maddie and Chim have their baby, will they expect him to be available too? Don't they realize that he wants to have a family too? He can't start if he is always helping others. He is gonna have to start saying no, pulling back. Just like everyone else has been doing. The thing he feared the most.

Now is a good time to start.

God, he hated feeling this way.

"Sorry, Eddie. I have dates lined up all this week."

Eddie gave him a funny look. "All week?"

Why is Eddie suddenly judging him? Shouldn't he be happy that he is trying? He was so happy to see Eddie happy again. He wanted that too.

"Yeah, my therapist said it would be good for me to dip my toe into the dating pool again. Get myself out there."

Eddie scoffed. "More like dive in head first."

"Whatever man. I am just trying to do something for me, for once."

He shut his locker and walked to his car, leaving a confused Eddie in his wake.

_It was Monday night. Date One._

**Dani - 23. Likes to surf. Guitarist for a local band. Has 2 cats.  
**

He was only waiting a few minutes at his table when Dani sat down with a huff in the chair across from him.. He smiled and was about to say something when she interrupted him.

"I'm a lesbian."

He sat back and blinked. "What?"

"I am a lesbian. I do not want to be here. My friends dared me to do this." She put on a fake smile and waved to two girls sitting at a table nearby. They waved back and giggled.

"So, in order to get them to back off from pulling stunts like this again, we are going to order food, and not talk, because I really don't want to be here. Then split the bill. I usually pay for my dates, but this is not what I had in mind. Then we go our separate ways."

He nodded, smiling awkwardly at her friends, who waved again.

Maybe the waitress had noticed the weird tension, so she made sure to come several times during the night, even to just fill their water glasses, and made short small talk with him. Dani was not interested in engaging in any kind of small talk. He was grateful but also embarrassed as the waitress kept glancing at him with what he could only imagine was pity.

The bill came and while they were waiting for their cards to come back he tried one more time at getting a conversation going.

"So, Dani. You are part of a band. Do you play in places nearby? Maybe I can come listen. Do you have a card or website?"

Dani looked up from her phone, and smirked.

"Sorry, just out of my garage. And nothing you would like, I'm sure."

She got up abruptly and motioned to her friends who whispered to each other. As they came closer, and Dani gave him a pleading look, he decided to play along, even though it made him feel like trash.

"This was nice, Dani. I had a great time. Maybe we can meet up another time?"

She turned to her girls and whispered something, then turned back to him. "Maybe." And they walked out.

He just shook his head in disbelief and got in his car and drove home. He was a little relieved that Albert wasn't home yet from whatever he was doing. He grabbed a beer and sat in silence for a few minutes. Groaning when he heard a key in the door. Albert walked in and smiled when he spotted Buck.

"Hey Buck! How did your date go?"

"Oh, fine. Nothing special, but we had fun." He didn't want more pitying looks, so he lied. That seemed to satisfy Albert who moved to the couch and turned on the tv.

"Movie?"

He nodded and sat on the couch, happy to have company, but it wasn't the same.

_Tuesday. Date two._

**Katie. 28. Librarian Assistant. Loves to Cook.**

He had picked a little cafe that had outdoor seating and it was a nice night.

Katie texted that she would be a few minutes late, parking was hard to find.

He glanced up when he heard his name being mentioned to the waitress. He raised his hand and she smiled and waved before making her way over. She was beautiful. Her picture on the app didn't do her justice. Short curly brown hair that framed her face. Her eyes were hazel with strong green flecks in them and they matched her green dress. He stood to give her a hug and help her to her seat and she was maybe an inch shorter than him, which was different, but nice.

"Hey Katie. Glad you found the place OK."

"Oh, yeah. There was a spot that opened up on the street, but the person behind me bullied their way in front of me, i have no idea how, but they zoomed like a madman and just took the spot, gave me the middle finger. I didn't even do anything, except move too slow i guess. I had to find the big lot a few blocks down. I shouldn't have worn heels. I always get myself in trouble." She lifted her leg to show off her heels.

"Well, you look great."

"Thanks. My sister once went on a date with this guy and after dinner he decided to take her on hike. She didn't have any shoes to change into, so they went on a flat trail. I don't know why she didn't just take off her heels, but she went in her heels the whole two miles, going and coming back. 4 miles in heels, can you believe it? She had the worst blisters. Had to take off work for a few days. You are a firefighter. You work with paramedics too? You must deal with some some crazy things."

He nodded. "They are amazing, Hen..." and that was all he got to say when she went on a tangent about her brother being saved in a fire last year. It was small, started in the garage. He had been asleep. Only suffered smoke inhalation. She was saved a few years ago in a car crash. Broke her leg, but it all healed now. Her grandfather needed to be saved when he fell into a well that created a sinkhole by their home. Broke a few ribs. Fine now. Still going strong. What? She continued to go on about people she knew that had unfortunate luck in their lives.

They had ordered food, somehow. She continued talking, telling stories. She would ask him something, he would get a word or two out and she would have stories for that too.

Their food came and he tried focusing on that. But she carried on talking about her favorite dishes that likes to make. "Do you like to cook, Buck?"

"Oh, yeah. My boss is a great teacher."

She smiled and went on a whole story about how she went to a cooking class with a date who was a teacher. He ended up taking over the class when the actual teacher had to leave for a family emergency. They dated for a few months, but it didn't work out.

All he could do was nod, and spit out a "sorry." before she went into another topic. Somehow she was able to eat her food in between all of that, because by the time he had finished his food, and he looked at her plate, it was all gone. She was currently using a piece of bread to get the last of whatever was on her plate. He couldn't even remember what she ordered.

The waiter came around and ask if they wanted to see the dessert menu.

Katie declined and he followed, not wanting to be rude and make her wait for him to eat. Not like he would have eaten it anyway. Maybe he will stuff his face full of ice cream later.

"Thank you Buck for a lovely evening. I don't see this going anywhere, though. I like a guy who can challenge me. I do give you props for being a good listener. Do they allow you to give reviews on the dating app? I'll have to check that out and make sure to include that."

He awkwardly laughed at that. They had made it out of the restaurant. "Thanks, I guess. Can I walk you to your car? Or drive, if you don't want to ruin your feet."

"Oh, no thanks. I'll walk. There was store I wanted to check out that I passed on the way here. Have a good night Buck."

She took off her shoes, waved them around, flashed him a smile and started walking the direction he assumed the store or her car was. He felt like he should follow her to make sure she was safe, but then he might just come off as a creepy dude following a woman.

He watched her until she was out of sight, and then heaved a big sigh, looking upwards at the sky. His head was spinning from all the information she was able to get out in a 2 hour window. He decided to go for a walk himself to clear his head. An hour later, he was still keyed up, but he headed back to his apartment. He found it miraculously empty, so he headed up to bed and threw himself on the bed and then flung an arm across his face.

He opened his phone and checked out the profile of the girl he would be seeing tomorrow.

He wasn't going to give up so easily. Two bad dates wasn't going to scare him off the dating circuit.

**Veronica. New to the area. Looking for a real connection. Accountant.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Veronica is next. We all know how that one goes.
> 
> He has a few more dates after that. They don't go well either. One goes in a direction he wasn't expecting.


End file.
